Please turn off all electrical devices before...

Okay, I know there are a lot of people out there that do this, but I don't understand it! When you go into a restroom you need to stop talking on your cell phone! I'm sorry, but that is just really gross! Nobody wants to hear you using the bathroom, this is going a little too far. Nobody is THAT important! A friend of mine told me a story of being in the ladies room, and when she was done, she flushed the toilet. The woman in the stall next to her yelled at her "WHY DID YOU FLUSH THE TOILET?? I AM ON THE PHONE HERE"!! HOW CAN YOU BE SO RUDE?"

Is your phone call that important that you can't call them back? Cuz I'm thinking it's NOT. I began thinking about this subject because today I witnessed someone going into the bathroom to use his cell phone. Every time he needed to make a call he would go into the bathroom. I'm thinking he's using the bathroom as his office. Weird, huh? Why is he making phone calls from the bathroom? He does have an office, maybe he's a secret agent.....maybe not! I would think you would be able to hear the echoing of the bathroom.("Hey dude, where are you, it's really echo-y, are you in a tunnel? and what's with the water, are you at Niagara Falls?")

Technology is great, but for me, I leave the cell phone OUT of the bathroom, and maybe so should you.

Big Night Out

Well the other Friday night I actually went out after 8pm! Shocking for me, but my bff and I went to the movies. The movies, at night, not a matinee, and not a Disney movie! This is not normal for me. The last "grown up" movie I saw was "Chicago" with my mom. The last movie my husband and I went to the movies and saw was "Independance Day", I think that was in 1994, but I'm not sure. So, this was a big night for me. I did not have a pocketbook full of popcorn, candy and drinks, (not that I would EVER sneak food into the movies!) that would be sooooo wrong! The first thing I noticed about going to the movies at night is that it is very, very expensive! I remembered that I had a movie "rewards" card, so I used it when I bought my ticket (for $9.50) UGH!! And then my bff used it too. After we got our tickets we went straight for the snack area, which my bff kept reminding me that if we had time before hand we could of gotten tons of snacks and snuck them in my pocketbook. Just so you know, my pocketbook is HUGE, I could fit a small child, or all of Paris Hilton's dogs in there! But like I said before, I would never ever sneak food into the movies. So, there we were looking at the huge display of crap, and the kid behind the counter asked, "would you like a pizza tonight?" What? A pizza? Are you kidding me?? When did they start selling pizza at the movies?? And why would you eat a pizza in the dark? Knowing me I would be wearing half the pizza on my shirt! So, I declined the pizza, but chose a small popcorn for $5.50, another ugh, and a small jug of soda for $4.50, ugh, ugh! I of course remembered to use my "rewards" card. I asked the cashier, "what do I get for using this card?" and he replies, "points". Wow, really, points?? That is wicked awesome! Um, no, what the heck do I do with points????? I guess eventually I might actually get a discounted or free item...maybe a pizza!
Ya'know, I don't know how the movie theaters do it...I don't really like popcorn that much and I definitely cannot drink a 2 liter of soda, but guess what, I bought them anyways! Subliminal messages! So we went and saw "Get Smart". I am a big Steve Carell fan, and this movie was really funny, stupid yea, but funny. I had to stop eating my popcorn numerous times because I was choking from laughing so hard. And my bff laughed so hard that she snorted, so that is usually a good indication that something is really funny! Don't expect deep dialogue or anything serious, just a really good laugh. So that is my movie review, I wonder why I'm not a movie critic....oh that's right, I completely ramble on and on and on. ~Stacy

ICE CREAM IS BETTER THAN EXERCISE!

Well, here I am, alone, I have the living room all to myself. No one needs anything, nobody will be calling my name. They are all in bed. Another day over. There is nothing on t.v. to watch, and I refuse to do any cleaning after 8pm. That's when I clock out. Although, I don't mind doing laundry at night, that's okay. But anyways, I bought a work out bench a few months ago, right around the time I quit smoking again for the millionth time. Actually I wasn't smoking full-time, but I was having one here or there. So, I decided that I would start exercising, and hopefully get some muscle tone to my scrawny self. And that was working well for awhile. I even went to a kick boxing class. I hadn't really noticed any changes, and of course I wasn't changing what I ate, but still I was in pain! Where were the results? Where was my six pack abs? I remember hearing some comedian say, "Pain is your body telling you NOT to do that". I was good about exercising every night, and that lasted for quite awhile, then it happened.....I got bored! It's not fun working out, or at least it's not fun to me. I don't mind riding a bike outside or swimming, but to go down in the basement and lift weights until my muscles hurt, or do sit ups until I feel like I'm gonna throw up, (which doesn't take me long), isn't much fun! So, instead of exercising, I've been eating ice cream cones. Yep, you heard me right, I said ICE CREAM! Now ice cream is so much better than exercise! Ice cream tastes good, and there are so many different kinds! I should warn you now, in case you take my advice, eating ice cream does NOT have the same effect as exercise! It actually has the opposite effect! So, I've gone up a few sizes since I've been on the ice cream diet, but hey, there's always tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll try to do the exercise...................then I'll eat the ice cream! :) Stacy

Don't Take My Picture

Here's Shadow. He's our other rug rotter, also a

shelter dog. Yup, we adopted him when he was 2
and we were fully aware (although that's debatable) that he was a St. Bernard mix. He was already full grown and he was just as furry. We didn't even go to the shelter to pick out a dog, We went there with the kids to check out the farm animals and see the petting zoo. But still we came home with this huge dog. It's been 7 years and I'd still like to know what his former owners did to him. He's terrified of TV remotes and cameras. We can't even get the camera out if he's in the same room. He'll immediately lose control of his bowels and there's dog pee everywhere. Did they used to put him in dreadful polyester suits and take pictures and laugh at him? Maybe they used the TV remote to make him watch hours and hours of Full House reruns featuring the monkey twins. C'mon, admit it they looked like monkeys when they were little.

Just getting this picture of Shadow was a feat in itself. At first I had him outside, because we can't allow pictures in the house. This is him hiding behind our blackberry bushes. I finally had to have Mitch come out and take the picture while I held the leash. I think it took about 20 pictures before he was able to get the one at the top. Normally, I don't torture the dog in this way, we use different methods. Just kidding!

As much as I love summer, I live in fear of thunderstorms. Not because I'm afraid of the actual storm, I'm afraid of what happens during them. Thunderstorms send Shadow over the edge. We have a drill whenever there's a storm approaching. As soon as we hear thunder in the distance, we run and get his leash and try to catch him. Everyone is running around in the house trying to get the dog and yelling, Get the dog out! Get the dog out! All we need are some air raid sirens to complete the picture. We get the leash on him and have to drag him outside. He, naturally, doesn't want to go out where the thunder and lightning is. and is thinking "What are these idiots doing dragging me out here for?" He's panting, drooling and running back and forth like a squirrel in the middle of the street. As soon as he does his business, we rush inside and he bolts down to the basement to hide until the storm is over. If we miss the small window of opportunity, he will completely lose control of all his bowels and there will be a puddle of pee the size of Lake Titicaca and a huge pile of poop. He's part St. Bernard, do I need to say more? So you can see the sense of urgency we feel to make sure this doesn't happen.

Did you see what that said????

I don't know if anyone is actually reading our blogs on our website, but if you are, I just wanted to point something out. There are ads at the top of the page, but they are not put on by us, they are randomly put there based on the topics we write about. Although, sometimes they are totally off subject. For example, I don't recall writing about needing a natural laxative for my cat! There was another one, but I'm not even gonna go there! So, keep an eye out for ridiculous ads, some are quite funny, and some sound scary! So, thanks for reading. Stacey

WARNING! FASHION POLICE!

One of our favorite things to do is make fun of people, and what they wear. I know it's mean, but you know you all do it too! C'mon, when you see somewhere wearing something weird, you stare, you laugh and you are glad you don't look that bad. I am careful about what I wear to work, because I know if I make a fashion faux pas, I will be called on it. The other day the fashion police did get me, I wore a green shirt, black pants and brown shoes. Apparently you are not allowed to wear brown shoes with black pants. I learned that this is a rule, and when I questioned it, everyone else seemed to be aware of it. Even the guy in the office that never matches, knew about the rule, actually he is the one who called me on it. Oops, my bad. But my brown shoes are so much more comfortable, and I figured if I had a colored shirt on, I could wear brown shoes instead of black ones. I've learned my lesson, and I won't do that again. There are many fashion blunders, and the thing is, most people think they look good. Now, when I was younger my mom would not let me out of the house if I looked like I didn't own a mirror. On occasion, clothes that I liked, would mysteriously disappear in the laundry, never to see the light of day again. When I became an adult I learned that these clotheres were not missing, they had been thrown in the trash. Although now I think I was better off having the clothes gone, well....maybe, most of them. I have not had to do this to my children yet, and I'm not sure that I will have to. I have two boys, and most days they don't care what they wear. So here are some of the things I have learned about what you should and shouldn't wear:
1. If you are over the age of 14, do not under any circumstances wear any pants that have a message on the backside. (i.e. juicy, sassy, etc)
2. Your underwear sticking out of your pants doesn't actually look good at all (even worse if it's not a thong)
3. Old men in speedos (actually any man in a speedo, need I say more?)
4. Socks with sandals (especially black socks)
5. Also, knee socks with shorts
6. For guys, jeans that are hanging around your knees with boxers sticking out (although this look is probably favored by the police, as I am sure it is very hard to run away from them with your pants like that)
7. Putting your hair in 2 pony tails if you over the age of 14 (this doesn't look cute)
8. Wearing pajama pants out in public (it makes you look like you escaped from the mental institution, especially if you add the slippers too!)
9. High heels with shorts or bathing suits (c'mon who does that? If people actual did that, there wouldn't be so many flip flops for sale)
I know there are more, but I'm drawing a blank. Just remember, if you don't want to be caught by the fashion police, look in the mirror before you leave the house, and have one good friend/mother/sister to tell you honestly how you really look in that outfit! Stacey

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT??

Like I mentioned before, my life can be strange. Living in the boonies does have its disadvantages. One of them is nature, and the wonderful little creatures that live in the woods behind our house. Usually there is a family of deer that are outside when I walk our dog at 10 or 11 at night. I'm beginning to get used to them, and they don't bother me, they just stare at the spotlight and then run off. But last night when I walked the dog, I had company. Bruno (the dog), was just about to go to the bathroom, when both of us noticed a glowing pair of eyes looking right at us. Now our spotlight only goes so far, so I couldn't tell exactly what kind of animal I was looking at. But I yelled, very loudly, "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?". Now, I would think that normally an animal would run away when someone is screaming at them, but not this one! It actually started trotting closer! AAAAAHHHHH! That's what I said, and I turned around and took off at top speed, dragging a dog who was trying to squat. I'm sure he was surprised and wondered "WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING?". I don't know if my feet touched the ground. Good thing my neighbors go to bed early, or they would of been hysterically laughing at me. My mom (Shirley), asked if whatever it was was chasing me. That was the last thing I was gonna do, turn around and look! In every horror movie when someone is being chased and they turn around to look, that's when they are attacked!! My goal was to get in the house as fast as possible, not check to see what it was or if it was following me. And let me tell you, I was probably as fast as an Olympic runner on steriods! World record speed! Needless to say, it took awhile to go to sleep last night. My mom said tonight I should bring out a really strong flashlight or something, but I'm afraid all the creatures will come out of the woods to stare at my really bright light! That's it for now.....Stacey